What has three hands but only one face?

- A clock.

Why is the letter "E" so important?

- Because it is the beginning of "everything"!

Who works only one day in the year but never gets fired?

- Santa Clause.

When can you have someting and nothing at the same time in your pocket?

- When you have a hole in your pocket!

Where can you always find money?

- In a dictionary.

Why do fish live in water?

- Because cats cannot swim!

What is black when it is clean, and white when it is dirty?

- A blackboard.

Why are grandpa's false teeth like stars?

- Because they come out at night!

What word is pronounced wrong even by native English speakers?

- The word "wrong"!

What will make more noise in your house than a dog?

- Two dogs.